… Six weeks have passed and I am trying to get back to routines. I decided to take a temporary position for five weeks, thinking it would be a good opportunity to get out of the house for a bit. When I applied, I had only really wanted part time hours as I wanted to ensure I could maintain the wellness and writing routines I had been developing over the summer. It turned out to be full time but even so, I thought, it’s only for a few weeks, I’m sure I can manage it.
But I didn’t.
I had to learn a lot for the new job, even though it was only short term and I ended up working a lot more than full time hours to get everything completed. Everything outside of work went on the back burner as I told myself it was only a couple more weeks.
I managed to hold on to some healthy habits for the first couple of weeks: planning for a making healthy meals (including taking lunches to work, never something I find easy), making sure I got in at least 30 minutes of exercise a day, and trying to get the right amount of sleep per night. I kept thinking that I would get back to writing on my days off or on a day when I wasn’t so tired.
But I didn’t.
Work swept in and took all of the space I had made in my schedule. I did manage to keep my Deadlines for Writers streak alive by posting a story on Wednesday, October 9th but I wrote it the day before the deadline and it got very little attention and editing. (But I am counting it as a win because I almost gave myself the month off but didn’t want to lose my streak. I’m still disappointed that it was the largest word count yet and I didn’t have the time to really take advantage of having extra words!)
I just had so much on my mind (there was a lot to learn and a very short window to get everything done), I just couldn’t find the creative space I needed to sit down and write. I tried all of the mindfulness things I have learned but really couldn’t find balance. Even when I wasn’t working, everything I did was still being framed by work – What did I need to do now because I wouldn’t be able to because I was working? How many meals would I need to make today because I likely wouldn’t have time to cook for xx days?
Am I disappointed? Yes. I was getting into a rhythm of writing and working on the other parts of my new business venture.
Do I wish I hadn’t done it? That one’s a little harder to answer.
I applied for and accepted the job out of curiosity. It was a unique opportunity for learning and doing something different. I got to work with some fabulous people and all the way through, I knew there was an end in sight and that I would be able to go back to my “old” life.
I also learned something valuable (or perhaps relearned). In the world of multitasking, I suck. Can I get a lot of unrelated things done at once? Yes. Perhaps not all of the things that are the best plan but I can still get a lot of things done.
But there is a BUT. When I have many things on the go, I will always default to fulfilling other people’s needs before my own. Because I knew what was needed at work, I felt compelled to just “hunker down” and get things done because people were counting on me.
But I didn’t do the same for myself. It has taken me about a week to regroup and figure out where things are at, what I need to get done and decide how I want to spend the next couple of months. I’m working to a bit of a timeline because I have been planning on doing NaNoWriMo this year and it all starts November 1st. More on this later.
I guess all I can really do is regroup and start again to build new habits and patterns. For now, it’s about getting back to my writing.
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